QS&L Directions Please

Someone wrote:
> Oh, PLEASE give me directions to the QS&L.  I love HOT and BURNING
> food and must try this place.  Be specific, I am new to the area.

      When the Wings Illuminati visited QS&L, beforehand I drove
there by myself to map out accurate directions for everyone else (one of the "anti-perks" of being one of the WI founders, I suppose.) Various people (hi Tom ;) have since then made fun of my directions, because there are at least a few more optimal routes.  But if you just want to GET THERE, and aren't concerned with finding the BEST way to get there until you're more familiar with the area, then these directions will work.

      Since other people may find this information useful, I'll just
reproduce the whole message.

      Note: if you know of better directions, by all means let me
know.  The WI hasn't been back to QS&L yet, so I haven't been searching for more optimal routes.

----------

Place:      Quaker Steak and Lube
      101 Chestnut Street
      Sharon PA 16148
      +1 412 981 7221
Date: Sunday May 22 1994
Time: 6:00pm
RSVP: please RSVP by Friday May 13 1994

      It is time.

      Wings Night for the month of May 1994, will be held at the
one, the only, Quaker Steak and Lube.  As noted, please RSVP by Friday, May 13.

      QS&L does *NOT* take reservations.  I will attempt to call
ahead with the exact size of our party, but be prepared for perhaps a 30-60 minute wait once we arrive.  Ask to be seated with the "Ralston" party.

      QS&L is also not inexpensive; a bucket of ~50 wings is
normally $13.75 (but will be $12.50 on Sunday).  This does not include the Atomic Wings; if memory serves, they are ~$3 for 5 and ~$5 for 10. Also, the wings are medium-sized (not the huge wings one usually gets at Aussie's or Kangaroo's, for example).  However, their wings are quite tasty, and their Atomic Wings have no equal.  QS&L will also do separate checks.

      Instructions (for those who need it) follow.

      Sharon is 78 miles (about 90 minutes) from Pittsburgh, in
Mercer County (close to Youngstown).  Drivers at this point are:

Mr. James Ralston Crawford, a Distinguished Illuminato Mr. Todd J Derr, a Distinguished Illuminato Mr. Rudolph T Maceyko, a Distinguished Illuminato

      If necessary, each of us can carry at least 3 passengers.  So,
if you need assistance in transportation, please contact
 as soon as possible.  Ride-sharing
is encouraged, as it reduces the number of people who must follow my directions.  ;)

      Here is a mileage/time chart of the route.  Mileages are
fairly accurate; times are approximate.  The mile and minute columns are the elapsed miles/minutes from the previous entry; the t.mile and t.minute columns are the total elapsed miles/minutes.  Also, an exit or road exchange is denoted by [A -> B], which means "at the place where you get off road A onto road B".

mile    t.mile   minute t.minute                           location
-------------------------------------------------------------------
   0         0        0        0                79N @ McKnight Road
  55        55       52       52                         79N -> 80W
  15        70       16       68               (exit 1N) 80W -> 18N
   5        75        7       75                         18N -> 62S
 1.5      76.5        3       78           QS and Wings (NOT Lube!)
 1.5        78        5       83                        62S -> 718S
 0.3      78.3        1       84                       718S -> 597E
 0.2      78.5      0.5     84.5                   QS&L parking lot

      Here is a rough ASCII map of the route:

    718N                18N

      |       -3mi-      |
62S --+------------------+-- 62N
      |         w        |
      |    |             | b
597 --+----+--           |
     s|s  X|          |  |
                     5mi |
                      |  |                 79N
                         |
                         |                ||
                         |     -15mi-     ||
   80W ==================+================++==
       ==================+================++== 80E
                         |                ||
                                          ||
                        18S               ||  |
                                          || 55mi
                                          ||  |
                                          ||
                                          ||

                                        79S

      Now here are the actual instructions:

      Step 1: get on 79N.  On the chart/map above, the McKnight Road
exit is mile/minute 0.  Continue on 79N until you hit 80W.  The last time I was on 79N, there was a lot of road construction, so be careful.

      Step 2: get off 79N at the 80W exit; continue on 80W.

      Step 3: at exit 1N (the last exit before the Ohio border), get
off 80W.  Exit 1N will be on the right; it will curve away from 80W until you are traveling almost directly perpendicular to 80W.  Your exit ramp will then become an on-ramp for the Beaver Valley Expressway (2 lanes in both directions).  The on-ramp for the BVE will put you in the right lane.  STAY IN THE RIGHT LANE, because after a very short distance (no more than ~1 mile), the right lane curves off to the right (merging into 18N) while the left lane continues straight.  (As I recall, this entire mess was fairly well labeled).  Continue on 18N.

      Step 4: at the fourth light on 18N, you will turn left onto
62S (which travels more west than south).  A few hundred yards before you make the turn, off to your right (a few "blocks" away) will be a large, square, ~7-story building--the First National Bank of Sharon (with a large neon sign on top of it).  You can't miss the bank; it's the only multi-level structure in that area.  Also, as before, I believe the turn onto 62S is clearly labeled.  Continue on 62S.

      Step 5: continue on 62S.  You'll pass Quaker Steak and Wings
(a McDonald's-ish extension of QS&L that just serves food; don't confuse it with QS&L!) on the left.  You'll start going down a long, gradual hill into the main drag of Sharon (62S becomes Main Street). Once the hill pretty much levels out, you'll cross some train tracks and go over a small metal-grating-type bridge.  The road will completely level out, and there will be buildings on either side of you.

      Step 6: *just* after you get through the main section of
Sharon, the row of buildings on the left stops.  There will be a stoplight here.  Diagonally to your left across the intersection, there will be a huge stretch of parking lots.  There will be a sign to your right that says "to 718N" and points to the right, and you can see that the road in front of you (62S; Main Street) starts to slope back uphill.  At this intersection, turn LEFT.  You will now be traveling down 718S, with the parking lots off to your right.

      Step 7: 718S makes a "T" with (I believe) 597.  You will have
about 12 billion stopsigns (at the side of the road, hung overhead, painted on the road, etc.).  Turn LEFT onto 597(?).

      Step 8: as you continue down 597(?), you should now be able to
see QS&L off to your right.  At the next intersection, turn into their parking lot.

      Basically, once you get to downtown Sharon, you can just stop
and ask someone if you need to.  It's a lot easier to show the rest of the way than it is to explain it.

      We hope to see as many of you there as possible.

the Illuminati